^{A little housekeeping. I got some feedback that the link I included in last week’s post didn’t work. Here it is. It’s a super cool resource called “Stop the Scroll” and will help you get an entire year’s worth of LinkedIn content in your calendar in 30 days.}

Now to today’s post.

You’re in the slow lane without a mentor.

So you’re a high achiever. Me too.

You you’re a self-starter. Me too.

You’re a leader. Me too.

Life seems fast.

It’s not.

If you’re all of those things without a mentor, you can be the highest achieving, self-startering, leading wizard, but you’re not moving as fast as you could be.

Confirmation bias is a real thing. And without a mentor stretching your horizons, you’ll only go as far as your current knowledge allows.

You’re only going to learn new systems and techniques as you create them.

Because you’re your own architect.

But you’re working with a shovel and spade.

Time to seek a mentor who will give you a wand.

Why to seek a mentor

Short answer? Time.

If I’ve learned anything since starting this newsletter it’s this:

To help those people faster, you need to seek people who are at least two years ahead of you.

That’s where your “mentor gold” is buried.

And finding them doesn’t need to feel like some daunting thing.

So where do you find them?

Your current network is a great place to start. This isn’t an Amazon style transaction you’re seeking, it’s a long-term + beneficial relationship you’re after.

In other words, it’s a waste of your time (and could be harmful) to just decide you need a mentor, do a quick search, and hire somebody.

So ask yourself some questions:

• Who’s someone I’ve looked up to for a long time?

• Who’s someone’s name I’ve heard over and over?

• Who around me looks successful and why?

Those questions will help you narrow down candidates of people you already have relationships with.

If the above answers didn’t yield any candidates, get on LinkedIn and look at people who are making change.

The beauty of social media is you can engage with these people directly. But don’t just ask them to be your mentor either.

Start a conversation. Get to know them. Pay attention to the gut feeling you’re getting. Then make the ask.

How to make the ask

There are some rules about asking someone to be your mentor. Here’s what they are:

• You have to respect the mentor’s time.

• You have to agree to some sort of timeline.

• There needs to be a plan in place on when you’ll meet and what the meetings will be about.

• You both establish that if it doesn’t work out, you cut it cold turkey (especially important with people you’re close with).

Those rules in place here’s a way to ask (remember, you should have had a steady dialogue going up to this point):

Making it formal is important. That way you both know what the relationship is.

Why a mentor puts you in the fast lane

If you’ve thought about self-development and growth for awhile, you’ve probably had these thoughts:

• I should take this course

• I should read this

• I should listen to this

• I should watch this

All good things. But it’s a DIY approach. And when you combine DIY with your confirmation bias, you’re moving at a snail’s pace in your development.

A mentor though? They’re someone who’s ahead of you in the growth game. They did this for you. They found what works and what doesn’t.

They’re your mainline to speedy growth.

Instead of spending 10 hours every week trying to watch, read and listen to all the things. You could spend 1 hour every couple of weeks with a mentor who will get you actionable advice and stretch your thinking.

That’s value and time-savings.

What about cost?

This one is hard to say for certain. Many mentors I’ve had over the years have done it for free.

I told them I’d pay. They turned it down.

That’s the ideal situation. When you offer to pay and someone says no, it’s because they care about you so much they never thought about money.

And as far as mentorship goes, I like this model.

If someone asks for money right away, make sure you know they’re legit. And know that’s not so much a mentor as a coach. They’ll have a system, they’ll have a plan, but it won’t be customized.

That’s still valuable. Just know what you’re asking for. Coaching services isn’t exactly mentorship.

Capeesh?

What to do today to get one soon

If you’re a high performer, a top leader or curious person but still wondering why you aren’t further along, you need a mentor.

Mentors come with:

• Existing frameworks

• Simple systems

• Actionable advice

• A wealth of knowledge

• Charisma and cheer

Steps:

1. Look at your existing network. Narrow it down to people you trust.

2. Book in-person or virtual meetings with all of these people for 45 minutes over the next couple of weeks.

3. Chat with them every day leading up to the meeting to build rapport and listen to your gut. Are you getting vibes they’d mentor you?

4. Get on the meeting and tell them what you’ve been working on. Ask what they’ve been working on.

5. If you feel good about it, make the ask. If you don’t, don’t.

6. Once you’ve got a “yes” ask what plans they have and how you can both make it successful. They should be driving. If they don’t have a plan, you can back out at any time.

7. Make sure you’re getting value every time. If you’re not, start again.

Finding the right person is a journey. I’ve had some mentors that I no longer have.

It’s not like it ended sour. Things change. People change.

That’s why you always need trust, a plan, and the ability to back out if it doesn’t work out.

A final word

I used to think that as the highest performer and most stout leader in the room, I didn’t have options to grow how I wanted.

I was wrong. I simply wasn’t seeking hard enough.

Mentors are everywhere. And if you’re sick of being in the slow lane, make it a priority to find the one that’s best for you.

And if you’re inspired but still need some more guidance, I’ve got you.

One of my clients told me my style is like a “heart-shaped calculator.”

I had to ask him to clarify. He said, “You lead with empathy, asking ‘what do want’ and making it about me. And then you give me systems and advice to get it done my own way.”

That was pretty cool to hear. HMU if it sounds like something you could use.

No charge to chat. It ain’t about the money.

What I’m working on

In the last month dozens of people I’ve talked to have said how difficult hiring is.

So I’m creating a video course to make it easy (and quick).

It’ll be 100% free. Want to get notified when it goes live? Reply “Hiring Playbook” to this email or head to my site.

Here’s a preview of the process.

This system helped me navigate over 500 applications, 30+ interviews, and make a bangin’ hire in <30 days. The time investment? <1 hour per day.

You’re not struggling to hire because there aren’t good people out there. You’re struggling to hire because your system sucks.

Stay tuned!

Here’s a lesson that took me farther faster

Heard of Nicolas Cole? I hadn’t either until a month ago. Now I’m quoting him all the time.

I’ve never talked to the guy. I don’t take his Ship30 course. I just listen to what he has to say.

The punch me in the face line?

If you want to:

• Lead

• Sell

• Market

• Write

• Promote

• Communicate

You need to realize the quickest way to success is through serving the other person.

When you help them solve their problems, you’ve tapped into the top 1% of their brains.

Every time you communicate, ask yourself:

“Is this about me or them?”

Keep making it about them and abundance will be there.

It’s a long one but give this a listen if you feel like you need to up your communication game (particularly online).

I'm using systems and resources to improve 1% every day.

I'm a Webflow disciple. It's what my website is built on. Get started for free. Need help designing a site? Let's call it a hobby of mine. Book with me here to chat about it.

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